A moment of clarity

The Hixx & HalfP1nt Show

For those of you that know me, you know how much I adore movies, the title of this bloggy is a ref to Pulp Fiction, when Jooles realises his days as a hitman are over he says 'I have had, what alcoholics call a moment of clarity'. The last couple of days I've been up and down in my moods, people I consider friends not able to take constructive criticism, forgetting all the times I have done things and even taken things on the chin in the name of friendship.

Take Saturday nite, we always have 2 friends around, now I'd been all psyched up ready to play 5-a-side, we even talked about it that night, I started playing 5-a-side basically as they were a man down for a few weeks...anyway, as they left...guess what, they don't need me!

How many times have I heard this now? Oh, we need you, can u help? Then at the last minute dump me from a great height...I could name more accounts but that would just be dwelling, like I say, this is my moment of clarity.

I've found my love of gaming dwindling to say the least recently. The quality of games has gone right down, add to this everything now hangs on online play it's just too damned much. I actually culled my friends list right down yesterday, just to make sure I don't get the latest spam message 'Ooh, this is on the marketplace' rubbish. And the amount of times I find myself getting annoyed at 'such and such is online' arrgghhhh...I dunno if I need to go back to the docs as my tablets don't seem to be working anymore, K has suggested councelling, we've had some great chats...my history is a tainted one, a sad one and mostly something I'd like to forget.

Speaking of K, wow! I've put her through the ringer, I'm not the guy she married, and I constantly worry that I'm not good enough for her, let's say that's all sorted now. We're together and we love each other, and that is the best thing in my life FACT!

This moment of clarity then, well yeah, there's my marriage, the strongest foundation in my life, so that's high on my new agenda...along with making sure K is happier than a happy thing in happy town.

The other main thing, letting my friends get me down, letting them walk on me when it suits. Letting fools who I barely know talk to me like I am a piece of rubbish, it all ends here. How? By not allowing myself to enter those situations.

All I end up doing when people annoy me is get mad, hurt myself, hurt my marriage and hurt my true friends (they know who they are) and it's stopping, right now. I don't think I'll blog anymore, in fact I thik I only started this to fit in with some of my lovely online friends I did make, u know, the ones that aren't annoying buffoons...ooo er, there I go again, getting ragey. That has to stop, now, period!

So here's to me, my wife and my friends. Those who decide to drop the new me, well that's their choice, I shall not stand in anyones way, I certainly won't argue with them, that's putting me in that place I dont wanna go.

Here's to life and all it's trials :)

Sunday is chill out day!

Wow, long time no blog :) We've been so busy recently..what with friends being over from London (2 sets) one couple and their little boy are moving to China at the end of the month and we're gonna miss them sooo much.

As well as that we had the Paintball weekend. That was awesome, and it was great to meet up with Cait, Aidan and Paul James again..it still amazes me just how well we all get on!

On top of all that this last week has seen the launch of http://www.weareversus.com, Cait AKA Vixen VS and Jade's AKA SIREN VS new venture, if you have any love of gaming get yourself over there, there's a great new community flourishing, plus I want everyone to support my friends in what I believe is a cool thing! I finally got to chat to Dan (Psibrid, Jade's boyfriend) this week...amazingly I feel like I've known the guy for years, he's done a fantastic job with the VersuS site and his photography is excellent!

Anyway, completed PREY today on my 360...enjoyed it even if the AI is pap, it's way toooooo short and it's not as clever as it thinks it is. I'm currently watching HalfPint play on LOTR: Battle For Middle Earth 2 demo, she likes it...me? Nah! Not my bag!

That reminds me, I should also give a shout out to Nat...been chatting to her this week and we seemed to have a case of 'bad timing' re: COD2...one of us was always busy when the other tried to start a game.

That's pretty much it! Oh, before I forget Sunderland beat Forest Green 3-0 in a pre-season friendly yesterday and this here really cheered me up :D

Jobs, friends and other bits

Wow, has it been that long since my last blog? I seem to go through phases...well, the last 2 weeks of work have been rubbish. Boring, unchallenging rubbish, let's hope it picks up.

The weekend Jade went to see Cait in Cornwall and judging by their blogs they had a great time. It's funny how friendships on the internet can get a bad rap but here is one that is truly flourishing.

Well, me and K went out a little at the weekend, but between Footie addiction and Back ache the house prevailed (again!). Shame the World Cup has to be played when the weather is soooo good! We had a lovely picnic tho sat under the shade of a tree, and just relaxed and enjoyed each others company while I tried desperatly to beat my own top score on ZooKeeper on the DS.

Hopefully with some new games on the way in the next month we can all get some fun gaming in again on LIve, altho K is spending WAY TOO much time on Animal Crossing Wild World for my liking ;)

Well, when I have something interesting to say, I'll post it. In the meantime, go check out Vixen or Vulpine's blog in my links...good reads they are, and proof that friendship prevails :D (and Cait I must change my links!)

World Cup Fever...and chips

Woohoo, a friendly tomorrow, some game that escapes me on tuesday then it's the World Cup!

I have often considered asking my doctor to sign me off with World Cup Fever, this strange affliction that only affects me once ever four years and leaves me sofa bound and wearing an England top whilst munching doritos for the duration.

I am approaching this World Cup with some skepticism, having been let down by England on nearly every occasion since their magnificent 5-1 Drubbing of Germany all those years ago. Add to that Wimbledon is also around the corner, another time when everyone get's hyped up by the Brit competitor only to be let down...

Well cheers for the boys! Let's hope they can do a job!!!

LIVE - The Soap...

Wow, who would have thought that online gaming would be so dramatic.
We've had love, hate, betrayal, kidnapped babies (ok made that one up)...paranoia, lusting, tourettes...actually maybe it's more like Big Brother.

I should rename this LIVE - The reality show. U can see it now, celebs raising money for charity whilst whining they weren't invited, or have been deleted from someones 'friends list'...all the while, us folks lapping it up on our tv screen. Thing is there's no 'experience' in simply watching on TV. You really need to take part in order to understand.

I think a lot of problems come from the 'anonymity' of simply typing or speaking to someone online. The name 'Friends List' doesn't help.

Let me get one thing straight, I'm not saying these guys aren't friends...in fact I am amazed by how well myself, HP et all got on the other week, but WE DO PLAY nearly every night. Then there's the people on the cusp, those who join when they haven't got a better offer, or their real mates are out. Trouble is, even think about deleting them and beware.

I've definitely enjoyed my time on LIVE, I've made some great friends that I do keep in touch with regularly, BaNdy and Vixen being but two...in fact, what I love is how we've also managed to make friends with Vixens other half Aidan, he's a great guy...

...but here comes the problem guys, I've mentioned 2 people, knowing full well that others may be offended that I missed them out, that I don't like them etc. It's not like that...it's just that we play together. I actually over time discovered I have loads in common with Vix and BaNdy, that's why they're mentioned...PJ don't worry I haven't forgotten you ;)

Tom's another one, a great guy...currently without LIVE and boy does it show :( Come back soon matey!

So I look forward to continuing my LIVE Reality, to come here to my diary room when I need to vent, ask questions, make remarks...generally waffle...I hope my friends, you can enjoy the journey with me.

This past weekend

Well, we're back in soggy guernsey...yup it's raining here too guys. Photo's are downloaded to computer, being downsampled for the web as we speak...will be uploaded in batches as and when I can be bothered lol.

Anyway, I'm not going into too much detail yet, mostly because I am knackered and want to be able to give a complete and true account later on. But for the time being I just want to say that this weekend we met some truly remarkable people, it was fantastic just to put faces to the voices we hear on LIVE most nights. You guys all know who you are :)

The Longest Journey

Well, it's been a bumpy ride but finally it's here. Tomorrow HalfPint and Myself meet up with Shockzz, Vixen, Mr Paul James and Nighbird for the first time :D

I cannot wait, it seems like it's taken forever, finally the big day is looming...here's to a great weeknd - with some truly great people :)